Sunday, October 31, 2010

nightmare kah?

mimpi tu..
btol mcm real. tak tipuuu
agak ngeri jugak. mcm ta sggp nk face klo btol2 jadik.:(
takpe lupekan.
we'll see wat will happen next year.

4 de whole day bdn smacam je rini.
dr pg bce bio ta msok2.
waghh rase nk ilang nyawe pon ad gak tgahari td.
saket la tesangat sngat.
alhamdulillah idop, tgh on9 agi.haha
er tido mmg ubat plg bes.
tyah ngn alfa tgk muvi je kje arini.
ak pon join.hish
pngaruh ta bek tanak kawan lagi ngn dorg.:p
nk bce bio.jom.

pen-off

tade gaye nk exam je ktrg ni..-.-'

Friday, October 29, 2010

step 1.

tak senang nak berubah. macam kau suroh org free hair pkai tudung. susah dorang nk trime kan. dorg cm ade reasons sndri npe tak bole pkai tdg lagi. ni bak kate embek ah. dat just the same happen to us. to me a aku rase. ntah a suddenly rse intec ni mcm medium transfomation plak. seryesly. tyah dah kot.wa'ey pon. embek jugak. just aku je ta bgerak lagi,
uhh
kalau dah de basic, since dlu mmg terdidik pkai tutop2 tu mmg sng je kan. tp klo mmg family ta bpe nk pakse sgt, tak tego pon, sah2 la rse bnde tu bnde besa.
in my opinion, kalau nk brubah, seyesly kau kne istiqamah. n bukan several part je, overall, sebab once kau dah btekad nk jadik baik, thats mean kau dah bsedia nk tinggalkan dunia dose2 kau tu, no more mixing aroung with guys, hang out, texting mnde ntahapehape takde faedah, karaoke kt ole2, gelak kuat2.. sng cte sume la.sbb kau now muslimah sjati. n kau kne jage title tu.
n aku still in the way to dat. jauh lagi. sangat.aku tanak spoilkan title muslimah tu bile ak brubah outside, tp inside still mcm er.. mcm ape2 je la.
tp tu ah nak tunggu, agk2 smpat ke? sure pnjg lagi umo?
haha tu ah cakap senang. nk buat tu rase berat gile.

4 the guys, aku tau korg senang je bab cmni. so pliss jgn asyik nk kutok je ktrg yg jahat2 ni. okay.

im still trying. mcm budak baru blaja jugak.step by step. n ak hope once aku dah start, aku tanak stop. ntok pastikan tu, mmg ambik mase. tu lagi baik drpd tak brubah lgsg, or trasnfom jdk baik, tp sbb ta iklas or rase tpakse, then jadik worst than b4. nauzubillahh..

doa saya
OH ALLAH
give me strength.
n of coz TIME.
i no we shouldnt wait,
but i no YOU understand me more.

saya nak jadik permata yang dicari.:')
saya akan cuba.
dan saya nak mula sekarang.
slowly k.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

exhausted

im crying just now
hmm ade improvement
dah lme ta nanges.
hati pon jadik keras smacam je.

now
rse penat pulak.
ni fakta ke?
nanges akn buatkn kte penat.
dan rasa nak tido.

tapi
sila siapkan repot bio dan agd sblom tido okay.

bad heart surgery.-.-'

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

cow's stomach.

lapar.
sangat.
dah penat sumbat mcm2 tapi still lapaaa
what i can do?
T^T
saya nak makan lagi sekarang.

jangan mintak!

Saturday, October 23, 2010

aswad dari ashwad.

nama dia amin yahya.
tapi mcm da nk tekubo je nme tu
now we call him ASWAD.
honestly im in love with this 'little thing'
n i no im dying if i lose him
bcoz i love him
like i love myself
mayb more than that
deeeeeeeeeepeeeeeer than dat


dia adik saya.

dear GOD, 
pliss dont ever let this feeling stop.
eventhough one day i will lose him
as aswad that i know right now.
dont let us apart 4 this short time
i wanna have such beautiful memories wif him

i will miss this little boy.:')

nanges?haha lawak la kau.

Friday, October 22, 2010

gorgoeus!

Baik Baik Sayang

Aku tak ingin kau menangis bersedih

Sudahi air mata darimu
Yang aku ingin arti hadir diriku
Kan menghapus dukamu sayang

Karna bagiku kau kehormatanku
Dengarkan dengarkan aku




Hanya satu pintaku untukmu dan hidupku
Baik baik sayang ada aku untukmu
Hanya satu pintaku disiang dan malammu
Baik baik sayang karna aku untukmu

Semua keinginan akan aku lakukan
Sekuat semampuku sayang
Karna bagiku kau kehormatanku
Dengarkan dengarkan aku


da lme ta dnga lagu endon.
yang ni 4 thumbs up la!
like2!

Thursday, October 21, 2010

just thanks Allah.:)

cantik tu subjektif. bkan hnye pd rupa dan wajah, mmg itu sudah sedia maklum.
Allah sukakan kecantikan, begitu juga manusia. tapi pernahka Allah membezakan manusia dari paras rupa makhluk ciptaannya? jadi mengapa harus timbul isu cantik dan tidak cantik dari kaca mata manusia?
kenapa harus bandingkan siapa lebih cantik dan siapa tidak?
astaghfirullah, janganlah jadikan kami dari kalangan mereka yg tidak bersyukur ya Allah.

i didnt choose my frens based on their beautifully created face dear.
i love to be frens with them just the way they are.
do u no smthig, i never thought im beautiful, i no im not.
becoz esp inside here, im not as pretty as u are.
hey,
im not a magnet as u told me
im not attracting people towards me without intention
i never want to do so
i dont deserve smthing like that
becoz im me n i no myself more than the others do
but i still feel thankful 4 wat i have now, eventhough they are really2 not perfct as the others.

believe in me, ure pretty, outside n inside thousand times more than me.
trust me:)
n sorry i no im too mean.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

past tense

relieved.
everything seems okay . i guess some of them really njoy that dinner. but maybe some of them not, including me.
seriously aku risau gile ape bkal jadik mlm tu. smpai mkn pon sciput. hish really regret about dat part.
tapi, dorang cm njoy je. ntah maybe bcoz vip xde n the envronment change to the unformal way.

another reason y i cant really participate well.
damn u SHAWL.
nightmare ah pkai mnde alah tu. tanak pkai da lpas ni!!
feeling stupid n ugly in dat black n blue shawl. i admit its beautiful but not when im the 1 who wear it.
nk amek gmba pon rse x konfiden.haish susah idop cmni.
then i think maybe dats the last shawl ill wear after dis.
until i get the confident back.

o yeah a bunch of thanx to our committe.:D
moja @ LEKAT- thanx kau handle sume bnde.  bak kate wie klo ko tak jdk PD ntah cmne a ni nnt.
congrats okay.
wie @ UGGY -kau pon jugak byk ah tlong.ak vote ko 100% jadik next pres HACC hahaha
ummunani @ AMBIL - lawa kite pnye kad kann.tenkiu ummu:)
pae @ ANUY - kawanku yg bbahagia mlm itu. ure sweet in white! seyesly.
alfa @ PLASTER - even bukan committe agd pon kau tlong jugak kot tman aku bjalan2 anta surat g HEP sume. time kaseh klasmet!
farie @ RAMJAH - brilliant ideas.thanx again.:)
n not forgotten
azim @SANGAP- tq 4 ur word. nk tlong tp ta ttolong kan.haha.tape lpas ni ak mntak tlong lagi.
hafeez @ TENDON -game ko mmg lahanat.sucikan hati sket okay.
er tu je la yg nmpk cm tolong.
aa to seniors n alumni BEDUL, MING2, LONJONG,ACHSO,NONENG, OJUS n yg seangkatan dgnnya,thanks for ur assist.really appreciate them.

sincerely,
KAMAM
'jr cool' kate HEROGAxD

Friday, October 15, 2010

Sabar untuk ujian.:)

just finished my ctis presentation dis morning. about UJIAN ALLAH or IBTILA'.
sabar is the bes medicine.

tadi turun bas nk g ktm, ntah cmane bole jato kt tangge.punye baek ak landing tade sorg pon prasan. 
thanx GOD.:)
bdak2 mane ntah (intec yg sure) tolong ak kutip bio notes yg bterabo ats tangge n pavement. terbang2 plak ketas ni.
takpe bukan aku yg kutip pon. diorang ade.ngahaha kjam2.
thanx to all those cute n smart boys dat helped me to chase my flying bio notes. next tyme i hope i wont see u all again. segan punya pasal.HAHA
kaki dah lebam 22.kne air lagi pedih. tapi takpe. better luke2 dari patah riuk tegolek dari atas tu.
ALLAH still loves me.:')



Thursday, October 14, 2010

tekanan perasaan.-.-'

mmg naek blodd pressre camni. makan garam byk2 pon takde high bp cmni.
uhh
2 more days to go. saket gile pale otak pk org2 yg tareti befikir dgn matang ni.
ok FINE la.
kau dah buat yg terbaik
papehal aku hope
Were all together. n always be with each other.
kite UNITE kan.:)
so lets pray 4 our succes.

Friday, October 1, 2010

ur future my future too..xD

apesal tajuk cm mrepek? hmm just discussed about future with my levly rumet, fathiah last night.topik yg salu je ad dlm pale. tp segan nak diskas.haha

memang menyeramkan kalo nk pikir sbnanye. er talking about future. apekah??
  1. Career
  2. Family
ni yang pling penting kot. career. urh ngeri2! agak2 bole pas a level x? bole fly x? bole jdk mdical student x?bole jadik doc x? bole tahan keje as doc x?
nak pth balek da ta sempat. and kne accpet jela this is my way. i have to finish it, wateve happened, comes rain or shine, i must be a DOCTOR. just keep struggling. if u failed, maybe theres smthing wrong  with u o Allah just wanna give u a test. pelagi kawen a klo ta lpas! haha

talk about KAWEN.
ni lagi satu rase nk tjon bangunan pk pasal ni. o noo im already 18. dlu mse kat skola ngengade nk kawen awal. ambek kau pdan mke ta ksampaian hajat.haha bcoz i have chose my future career to be a doc, so i must get married at least b4 or when im 25. er awal ke? lagi 4 taon fly, pastu blek sni bru 25 ke 26 cmtu a. waa da tuaaaaa. ceh ak rse sure anis kawen dlu.takpon mimi ke.afiey lagi la awal kot.intan? T^T sedih a camni. ntah2 tale attend pon. cmne nak jadik pengapit..
ah ta kire shada ngn tyah kawen aku kne jadik pengapit jugak. tak kire a ak da kawen blom tyme tu.haha

okay nk menyelit jiwang sket.
hmm we cant predict wat will happen in our future rite, but i always pray that i'll get a good hasben dat can lead me to HIM. i no im a girl. er lady wont be bad. and of coz a lady need a guy in her life. myb more than just to protect, care n love her. and now i keep praying that dat guy will accept me as who i am.
*nak engineer bole?xD

dear my parents,ayah n ibu pliss don go before me. i wanna take a good care of u 2, perform our hajj together2. i promise i will be a good daughter 4 u 2 foreve. till my last breath.. :')